after 4 years.... regret...

its 6am... tried to sleep but there's juz too many things going thru my head... or maybe there's only one thing.. regret...

just seen my results and known my honours grade... i've never been happy even once throughout the 4 years in ntu when i see my results... but the strangest thing is that this is the first time in my uni life tat i get such good grades... so pleasing on the eyes... but looking down further on the summary of my four years im juz the average stool...

yes im already expecting this before i check my results.. but the problem is that with all my efforts and results of my final sem... it is useless in changing my fate... i might as well screw up my last semester and settle with my fate...

lying on my bed and closing my eyes just throws me with every regret i have for the four years... stupid mistakes i made... not studying enuff... not having enuff sleep... if only i studied as hard as i did in my final sem.... yes... the damned word "if only..."

there's nothing i can do... i know i already did my best, for once... i know i shld move on... but i juz cant help feeling sad... *sigh*